No One Likes to Deal with Death
The real purpose behind the Art of Living Happy is helping people to find and harness happiness in their lives – not just in the average day or when things are going well, but when everything is falling apart. Finding the means to create your own happiness is most important when things are at their worst – it is the truest test of your happiness.
If you don’t know my story, I lost my husband Ian after a seven-year battle with cancer. He was 44, and I was 37.
It was the most difficult part of my life, and I struggled to find any kind of happiness. Only by connecting to my own inner wisdom and seeking divine guidance (daily) was I able to find just enough happiness to keep me going.
One of the hardest parts of the whole process was how most people treated Ian during his final few months of life. The phenomenon is called avoidance – when even friends and loved ones are too uncomfortable with the prospect of death, they avoid the subject, and with it, avoid the person who is nearing the end of their life.
Death is scary. No one likes to talk about it. No one likes to deal with it. Yet this seems absurd because every last one of us will someday meet our end, and perhaps even more important to realize: it’s safe to assume that all of us will have to deal with the loss of a loved one at some point in our lives.
I came across this video featuring the wonderful Stephen Garrett, author of When Death Speaks: Listen, Learn, and Love, and it’s a fitting description of how many people clam up when it comes to confronting the death of a loved one, as well as some great advice on how families can overcome this fear.
The video is less than four minutes long – and is worth every second. I highly recommend you watch it.
The lesson Stephen imparts, simply put, is this: when you know that someone is dying, don’t avoid them! Embrace them and ask what you can do for them! Confronting the scary topic of death is only a matter of facing the fear holding you back.
When we can overcome this fear, we can share our love and support with a loved one as they approach the end of life. We can reminisce happily, offer comforts, make the necessary plans to ease the process and settle affairs, and above all, spend quality time with our dying loved ones that isn’t shrouded by unspoken discomfort.
It is only after we step through the door of fear that we can learn our greatest lessons and offer our greatest gifts.
I’d love to hear about the ways you’ve dealt with loss and death in your life. Leave me a comment so we can continue to learn and grow together.
Love and blessings,
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